Some social questions about people1/10/2024 It’s not that you should never ask closed questions. Plus, open-ended questions take the conversation deeper, which makes it a more satisfying experience for both parties. And because they demonstrate the asker’s curiosity and interest in the other person, the other person reciprocally becomes more interested in the asker. In contrast, open questions cause the responder to reflect and reveal a little more about themselves, which people generally enjoy doing. One closed question fired right after another can make a conversation feel more like a shallow, stilted interview. They’re more like essay questions, and the genius of them is that they’re accordion-like in nature: rather than putting people on the spot, open-ended questions allow them to reveal more or less about themselves, depending on their comfort level.Īs Alan Garner lists in Conversationally Speaking, open and closed questions tend to begin with different respective words: Open questions, on the other hand, solicit the other person’s thoughts, feelings, and/or interests and can be answered in ways that are more diverse and expansive. They fish for facts, and are akin to multiple choice questions on a test. So today we’ll talk about what makes open questions different from closed ones, and how to effectively deploy the former to build personal charisma and enhance your connections with others.Ĭlosed questions are those which can be answered in a few words or less. Maintaining your curiosity about friends and family ensures you continue to have deep, interesting conversations that keep your relationships fresh, satisfying, and strong. The ability to ask good open-ended questions isn’t just important for building small talk with new people, but also forging stronger connections with those you’re already close with. And not just any questions: open-ended ones. The best way to ensure your small talk grows into something more substantial is to ask the other person questions. Initiating small talk with someone may be the hardest part of managing an interaction, but once you’ve taken those first few steps, your work isn’t yet done.Īfter exchanging a few pleasantries, your job is to nurture those first buds, lest they be struck with the freeze of awkward silence and die on the vine - killing a potential relationship before it’s even begun. Social Briefings are short bi-monthly dispatches that offer practical tips to improve your social skills.
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